Conversations with Christopher: Frankenstein's monster
Rpb: Frankenstein's monster: Is he a zombie, or a robot?

Christopher: I dunno. That's a good question though

Rob: It is.

Christopher: cause he's really kinda both. Or maybe more like a cyborg?

Rob: Except that he doesn't eat brains.

Christopher: Cause we all know that all zombies eat brains

Rob:Wouldn't it be awesome if he ate the brains of his bride?

Christopher: For real

Rob: And yet, he doesn't have the urge to "exterminate" like a robot.

Christopher: this is also true

Rob: In the end, it remains an enigma for all time.

Christopher: I'm not quite sure if you can ever truly determine the answer to that question, cause maybe there isn't an answer? Or maybe we're just being overly stupid

Rob: I'd say the former.

This is why Metal Gear Solid 3 is gonna be great.

Kill Bill. My house. This weekend.

This is the ultimate KISS collectible, " said Simmons. "I love livin’, but this makes the alternative look pretty damn good." Simmons appeared on The Howard Stern Radio Show this morning to pitch the product, saying, "Most caskets go for $3,000 but ours will sell for $4,500," prompting Stern to chastise him for not giving fans a deal even in death.

Gamegirl Advance on Why Rez is one of the best games of all time

Excited, we inserted our very first Japanese game into our brand new console. We hooked up the trance vibrator, and I began to play the game. The game is, truly, a stunningly beautiful thing. It is a "music shooting" game, but of such elegance and coolness it's in a genre all its own. The premise places you as a futuristic hacker, avoiding security systems and navigating through databases to crack codes in a way strongly reminiscent of Tron. Your mission: information needs to be free. "Flying down neon corridors shooting space/machine beings in time to techno music", as Justin put it, is a pretty good description, as is "Tron on Ecstasy." The game bills itself as synesthesia - union of senses. But even that doesn't begin to relay the feeling of the game. Even without the trance vibrator, the game puts you into a trance state - it's a raver's game, a game of pure sensation. The goals are simply to progress to the next level - not so complicated. But getting there is a sublime visual and aural experience. There's also an invincible "travelling" mode, if you want to just sit back and move through the levels without worrying about your avatar's taking damage.

But god damn, the trance vibrator started thumping like crazy in time with the music.

Well, what would you have done? I moved the vibrator into my lap.

More in link.

"After that night, I never saw Guitar Wolf again. Courage and rock 'n' roll: that's what he taught me that night."

The Smoking Gun on the Real World's Rape Scandle

TSG has done many dopey stories about reality television and the misfits who populate those programs, but the below search warrant application provides the most disturbing glimpse yet into the dysfunctional TV form. San Diego cops got the warrant last Tuesday after a woman told of being raped in the home where MTV's "Real World" is currently being filmed. According to the 22-year-old victim, she was at a nightclub when she met the rape suspect, who is identified only as "Justin" in the warrant application (the man is reportedly an acquaintance of a male cast member named Randy). The woman said that Justin offered her a beverage, but after finishing the drink, "she blacked out and woke up the following morning...in the guest bedroom on the set of MTV's Real World." When she awoke, the woman was disoriented, had trouble talking, and realized that "someone had had sex with her while she was unconscious." She also noted that an MTV camera crew was filming her at the time she awoke.

More in link.

My Best Friend's Birthday, the first Quentin Tarintino movie is now on sale for all of you cinephiles out there.

Orgy hotels to reopen in China

Two hotels involved in a mid-September "orgy" involving nearly 300 Japanese travelers and about 200 Chinese prostitutes in southern China are preparing to reopen after a forced closure, news reports and hotel personnel indicated Tuesday

More in link.

Ways to kill time during the democratic debates
I offer you two solutions. The first one is Democratic Debate Bingo. A brilliant use of resouces by the the Republican National Comitee.

Second up is the the Democratic Debate drinking game, for those who feel that a debate is best seen through beergoggles.

I'm the new Vice-President for the Fort St. John Film Society.
And for those who still live here in town, I can promise you that we'll be screening a bunch of great movies in the new year. Can you say Lost in Translation? I can, baby!

This is why I love guerrilla protesting.

Time to listen to James Kolchaka's "Show Respect to Michael Jackson"

The Hellboy trailer is up

Mark Hammil's stage play comes to an end

-- "Six Dance Lessons in Six Weeks," a comedy starring Polly Bergen and Mark Hamill, closed Sunday on Broadway after a run of only 30 performances.

Richard Alfieri's play about a retired Florida school teacher and her dance instructor received mostly negative reviews when it opened Oct. 29 at the Belasco Theatre. The Associated Press called the play "innocuous" and said it recalled "wan Broadway comedies of years gone by, shows that inexplicably got to New York and then disappeared quickly." Variety described the show as "a desiccated piece of Florida dinner-theater driftwood."

"Six Dance Lessons" has done meager business since opening, last week grossing only $78,728.99, and filling only 30 percent of the seats at the Belasco

More in link.

The Palestinians are making 9/11 memorial toys

Stonechild hearing resumes, key question unanswered

After a month break, the judicial inquiry into the mysterious death of a 17-year-old Aborginal teen found frozen to death in a field north of Saskatoon in 1990 is resuming this week.

Saskatoon police have been accused of leaving Neil Stonechild to die in sub-zero temperatures 13 years ago, but the inquiry has yet to answer the most important question around the teen's death: How did he end up in a field north of Saskatchewan?

More in link.

Monday's pile of addictive webjunk
My friend Stephen found a website called group hug. group hug is an annonymous site where you can confess your dirtiest sins in with complete anominity. By the same token, the site showcases everyone else's sins for your enjoyment.

On the same theme is one of my favorite websites, lowbrow. Like grouphug, lowbrow is a site made of of annonymous essays about people at their lowest moments. Alternately funny as hell and pathetic.

Lastly, Michael Jackson has unveiled a new website dedicated to his innocence. The website is a must who want the unvarnished truth about the allegations, straight from Jackson's mouth.

I need your help
Anyone know of a website that allows you to track your DVD, music, book and videogame collection?

The Gardien's 40 best directors of all time
Oddly enough, the directors are classified in RPG terms of Substance, Look, Craft, Originality and Intelligence. Time to roll a d20.

On another note, DNTO's reviewer called Cat in the Hat Lyncian nightmare. I had no interest in the film until it was described as such.

RoBlog is #1 when it comes to Japanese Crime Fighting Perverts

Rob's Matrix Revolutions drinking game
I made this up while watching Matrix Revolutions when I hung out with Team China last night. Recommended drink for the film? I suggest a Heineken as it's the Official Beer of the Matrix. Be aware, there be spoilers below.

Each time Neo asks a question, take a drink.
Each time a pointless new character is introduced, take a drink.
Take a drink each time someone says "goddammit!". Take two if it's Roland, the captain of the Hammer.
Take a drink when the Kid looks around wide eyed and confused.
Drink the bottle if you hear someone laugh when Trinity dies.
If a character provides a monologue longer than a minute, drink until it's over.
Drink when someone doubts that Neo can save the day.
Take a drink when someone states their belief in Neo.
Drink the bottle if you see Larry Wachoski's post op cameo.
Take two drinks for each Dragon Ball Z hyper explosion.

Macleans just did a cover feature on the cult Canadian television show, Trailer Park Boys.

I just found out that Pearl's getting married
What a shock. I feel old.

Chinese Swords

These handsome weapons are full of tradition. Imported from Hebei, China each weapon is crafted from traditional materials and hand made with local pride. Hebei province is not only the center of Northern Chinese Martial Arts, but also its main steel producer. Made by renowned sword makers, the straight and broadswords are flexible from 90 to 180 degree bends. They make a perfect addition to anyone wishing to use them for demonstrations, practice or display. The material is made of quality "Wushu Steel" and highly favored by Wushu practitioners around the world. Not sharpened.

More in link.

New meme: Japanese crime fighting perverts.

Lets give it up for Warren Ellis and Matt Fraction for finding the page. Props to David for naming it.

Jones introduces new flavour

In time for the Thanksgiving holiday, Jones Soda will launch a limited production of the sugar-free and no carbohydrate Turkey & Gravy flavored beverage in the Washington and Michigan markets.

“We are really excited about the limited test launch of our new flavored Turkey & Gravy beverage. This seasonal flavor allows us to enter a new market segment, the meal replacement market. The new flavor will also appeal to new consumers, those who prefers a savory type flavor to the traditional soda flavors,” says Peter van Stolk, President & C.E.O. “With consumers becoming more and more health conscious, Jones Soda's Turkey & Gravy flavored beverage is a zero calorie and zero carbohydrate beverage that can be served warm or cold with a full flavor that will meet and will exceed our customer's expectation.”

More in link.

Okay....

Police raid Jackson's Neverland Ranch

Police armed with a search warrant swooped down on Michael Jackson's Neverland ranch in California early Tuesday, scouring the amusement park estate for evidence in what authorities called an "ongoing criminal investigation."

Authorities refused to say what they were searching for or to describe the nature of the investigation. However, a lawyer who represents the pop star's family, but not Jackson specifically, said the probe stemmed from accusations of child molestation.

More in link.
Interesting time too. The day they raided Jackon's place was the day that his new single deputed. Double whammy!

So you want to see the Clone Wars animated series?
You do? Okay then.
Here's the first episode,
the second,
the third,
the fourth
the fifth,
the sixth,
and the seventh.

RoBlog is one year old today
Yep, that's right, one year ago, in a fever dream, I created this horrible waste of bandwidth. As a result, Rob would like to know how this blog changed your life. Did it destroy your marriage? Transform you into a god like being? These are things that I *need* to know.

You know you love me.

insert coin's review of Viewtiful Joe as an example of post modernist gaming

Viewtiful Joe’s seemingly saccharine and superficial storytelling belie a poignant parody that shares in the subtle subversion of the Simpsons. While the delivery suffers from some unintelligibility (Hulk Davidson) and is not as delivered as the Simpsons, the humorous and witty social commentary is out there. Particularly praiseworthy is the parallel between “The Producer”, and George Lucas, which becomes explicit in the final level. Here it is revealed that the producer is a man who 20 years ago was hailed as the most revolutionary producer ever. A revolutionary who over the course of 20 years became a forgotten and fat man. A fat man who was sucked into his own movie world only to fall to the dark side and become a villain. A villian who commands “DIE- Fighters” on a Space Station with enough power to destroy a planet. Once one realizes that Captain Blue is a caricature of George Lucas, the humor really shines through. As scripted in the opening cinema, Joe is the diehard fan of a movie that, as he explains to his twenty something girlfriend, came out when they were just kids. Sound like anyone you know? Having lost his touch, Captain Blue then passed the torch to Joe, and in this manner plays the role of both Obi and Ani. A fantasy that has crossed the mind of nearly every Starwars fan who has seen the prequels. But I don’t think George Lucas has a bisexual blonde daughter. The allegory has to end somewhere…

More in link.

This one's for you, Stephen.

"There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys, and whose emission was like that of horses" - Ezekiel 23:20

US fails to de-classify UFO intelligence

George W. Bush raised a few eyebrows during the 2000 presidential campaign when he responded to a question about releasing government files on unidentified flying objects. "It'll be the first thing he (Dick Cheney) will do," Bush said. "He'll get right on it."

Immediately upon assuming office, however, the Bush administration exhibited an impulse for even tighter controls on government information, long before the 9/11 security clampdown. From Bush's immediate suspension of the 1978 Presidential Records Act to Cheney's refusal to comply with a General Accounting Office request for the names of the Vice President's Energy Task Force members, patterns of concealment are consistent. Just last month, Bush signed Executive Order 12958, which gave the director of the Office of Science and Technology Policy the unprecedented authority to declare information "Top Secret."

"They didn't explain a rationale for it," says Steven Aftergood, director of the Federation of American Scientists' government secrecy project in Washington, D.C. "The only way to know for sure how significant it is, is to come back a year from now and see how many times it's been exercised."

More in link

I love Japanese criminals. Really, I do

Ever wanted to know what qualifies as demonic possesion? These Christians will answer your questions.

This is what they did to me, by Maher Arar

I asked him what he wanted to hear. I was terrified, and I did not want to be tortured. I would say anything to avoid torture. This lasted for four hours. There was no violence, only threats this day.

At about one in the morning, the guards came to take me to my cell downstairs.

We went into the basement, and they opened a door, and I looked in. I could not believe what I saw. I asked how long I would be kept in this place. He did not answer, but put me in and closed the door. It was like a grave. It had no light.

It was three feet wide. It was six feet deep. It was seven feet high. It had a metal door, with a small opening in the door, which did not let in light because there was a piece of metal on the outside for sliding things into the cell.

There was a small opening in the ceiling, about one foot by two feet with iron bars. Over that was another ceiling, so only a little light came through this.

There were cats and rats up there, and from time to time the cats peed through the opening into the cell. There were two blankets, two dishes and two bottles. One bottle was for water and the other one was used for urinating during the night. Nothing else. No light.

I spent 10 months, and 10 days inside that grave.

More in link .

The CBC did a story on Arar after he was released. If my memory serves, Arar had requested, after he was detained as an enemy combatant, to be returned to Canada. Under international law (or perhaps American law, I'm uncertain), you cannot be deported to a country where you're in danger of being tortured. The United States ignored his request and sent him to Syria where he was tortured. Clearly, this is another victory for the Homeland Security Act.

Cumming to television soon....

Urban Legends of Homeless Children

On Christmas night a year ago, God fled Heaven to escape an audacious demon attack -- a celestial Tet Offensive. The demons smashed to dust his palace of beautiful blue-moon marble. TV news kept it secret, but homeless children in shelters across the country report being awakened from troubled sleep and alerted by dead relatives. No one knows why God has never reappeared, leaving his stunned angels to defend his earthly estate against assaults from Hell. "Demons found doors to our world," adds eight-year-old Miguel, who sits before Andre with the other children at the Salvation Army shelter. The demons' gateways from Hell include abandoned refrigerators, mirrors, Ghost Town (the nickname shelter children have for a cemetery somewhere in Dade County), and Jeep Cherokees with "black windows." The demons are nourished by dark human emotions: jealousy, hate, fear.

More in link

Go go chichiren!
And thus ends my day of Perfect Love.

Judith Scott (born 1943), a fifty-five year old woman with Down's Syndrome, has spent the past ten years producing a series of totally non-functional objects which, to us, appear to be works of sculpture, except that the notion of sculpture is far beyond Judith's understanding. As well as being mentally handicapped, Judith cannot hear or speak, and she has little concept of language. There is no way of asking her what she is doing, yet her compulsive involvement with the shaping of abstract forms in space seems to imply that at some level she knows. Judith possesses no concept of art, no understanding of its meaning or function.

More in link.

More music
Raised by Wolves's cover of Simon and Garfunkel's Feeling Groovy
Duboce Triangle featuring Orphan Gaby covering You're a Mean One, Mister Grinch

Check out Song Fight
Song Fight is a website for all you musicheads out there. Every week, a song title is given out and musicians write a song inspired by it. Every week, readers of the website vote which song they think is the best.

Lots of great music here. Worth listening to if you're into the low-fi scene, like I am. Expect smart Gene Defcon-esque music.

This sounds also sounds fucking ace

Some of you don't know how good the Pillows are. The rest of you need to be reminded

Chretien Confesses Italian Rooftop Prank

My grandson said, 'Grandpapa, let's escape.' So we managed to escape ... and it was quite a thrill. You know, we jumped from one roof to the other roof to a third roof," Chretien said with a boyish chuckle in remarks broadcast on CBC radio on Thursday.

"And when we arrived (at the edge of the third roof) there was a bunch of carabinieri cars there, and my grandson wanted to slide along the pipe.

"(But) these guys shoot and ask questions after that, so we went back and we found another way and we managed to escape for about an hour," said Chretien, who is set to step down after a decade as prime minister.

More in link .
As of today, Jean Chretien is no longer leader of the Canadian Liberal Party of Canada. He'll be missed.

Hanging Corpse Admired as Sculpture on Campus

Police on Friday removed the corpse of a man believed to have hanged himself at least a year ago after builders and students at Budapest's University of Arts had initially mistaken it for a modern sculpture.

More in link
Some say that art is dead. I'd say that they're right.

Fathers who breast feed

I first became interested in male lactation in 1978 after reading Dana Raphael's book, The Tender Gift: Breastfeeding. Although Raphael only dealt with the subject briefly, she did say that men can and have produced milk after stimulating their nipples.

My husband, David, and I were intrigued with the idea. We had just had our first unassisted homebirth and were excited about applying our positive thinking techniques to other aspects of our lives. Although Raphael had written about milk production through nipple stimulation, perhaps, we thought, David could do it simply through suggestion. He began telling himself that he would lactate, and within a week, one of his breasts swelled up and milk began dripping out. When we excitedly showed my father (a physician) David's breast he said, "Obviously there's something physiologically wrong with David." The fact that David had willed himself to do this, did not impress him. We knew, however, that this was yet another example of the power of the mind.

Still, we were not ready for David to actually breastfeed our baby. First of all, there was no need for it. I was doing just fine on my own. But more importantly, he simply had no desire to do it. After he discovered that his body had indeed been responsive to his thoughts, he suggested to himself that the lactation would stop, and within a week his breast returned to normal. The experiment had been a success.

More in link

Matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match....

My friend Stephen's review for the Matrix: Revolutions

For Mike:Alyson Hannigan's Playboy interview

My weekend plans

Friday
In my continuing desire to get out of the house and do something on Fridays, I plan on either going out and having a coffee with Megan (assuming she has no plans) with me speaking louder than necessary and making wild hand gyrations. If that doesn’t work out, Team China will require me to transport them to the bar and translate their drunken attempts at English obscenities.

Saturday
Christopher is coming back to visit for the long weekend, and since I’m the resident chauffeur in the family, I’ve been detailed with picking him up. If Steven decides to come with me, I’ll have to squeeze in a matinee plus the usual Grande Prairie stops (comics, Future Shop, the pawn shops). If not, I go to GP alone, and will make the trip a lean mean one. Christopher expressed lots of interested in baptizing us with the goodness of Zombies!!! Whether anyone will be awake enough to play with him into the wee hours is a mystery.

Sunday
Sunday shall be the day of feasting in our house. My mom has a huge meal planned for Christopher, which most likely includes one of our larger turkeys. While we’re not gorging our selves, we plan on watching the whole entire Matrix trilogy in one go. After that, God willing, we’ll sate our samurai lust be watching the Seven Samurai and Shogun Assasin.

On the internet, you can find Pink sock pornography
Horrah for the masturbation super highway!

Yes, it's for toilet paper.

Damn you Nintendo! Damn you and your must have Zelda disc

Rob wants to know what you thought of the Matrix: Revolutions

The 10 Commandments of Simon
Very funny and well worth reading

Does whatever a spider can…